Strugr

As many of you know, I was deconverted to atheism several weeks ago by the brilliant arguments put forth at Discomfiting Christianity. Since then I have been trying to convince my peers using the 'Argument from Non Evidence that Demands a Confused Verdict' (John W. Lostus, a frequent poster at Discomfiting), but they cling to their superstitious belief in cause and effect and universal gravitation and the laws of logic. This week I will be holding atheist revival meetings for my fellow canines. I want to convince them of their meaninglessness, and the vegetable ultimacy of their existence. As Dan Barker pointed out we are no more than cosmic pieces of broccoli. And as Dan Barker also pointed out the real beauty of this is that it frees us to assign random, illusory value to ourselves and cling to the illusion. I have decided to assign to myself the random illusory value of 'world dictator' while assigning to everybody else the random illusory value of 'expendable serf'. I weep with the beauty.

I have written an invitation hymn, to be played on half empty glass coke bottles by the Delinquent Boys Choir. It goes like this:

Just as I am,

A piece of cheese,

Dislodged from the nose

Of a cosmic sneeze:

Here in my hand I hold three peas,

And know I mean no more than these.

We will sing this 99 times an evening while asking people to come forward, until the last evening, which will be the campfire service. On that night the ushers will pass out handfuls of peas. After singing "Cosmic Sneeze" 99 times, we will each assign random, illusory value to the peas. Then we will throw them in the fire.

Perhaps that will communicate the beauty of atheism these people keep missing.