That is my new title. I, like Oliver Cromwell, will stand between these chickens and this government in their hour of need. And I take my responsibilities very literally. The key word is 'between'.
But the real point of this post is because I have two new friends. They sent me a package. They know I am an intellectual because of my researches into Marco Polo and martial arts, and the resulting post on Judeo Christian Ethics. So they sent me two books of poetry making merciless fun of cats.
These are my new friends: Vic & Lauren.
And this is what they sent me: Glamorgan's Tales & He Who Would Be Cat
Please note how influential I am becoming. I am meeting authors and publishers and receiving expensive gifts ($184.53!). You never know what will happen with my efforts in the area of Christian Romance Fiction.
Last night I received a surprise from Lauren before I went to bed. I had, you understand, been sleeping all day but this made me very tired. The surprise was a poem, and a proverb. The proverb was: "For they sleep not, except they have done mischief; and their sleep is taken away, unless they cause some to fall. (Pr 4:16)" This proverb is so wise that I meditated on it while tripping bugs with a blade of grass until I fell asleep.
Here is the poem:
Glamorgan's Concept of the Time-Space Continuum
That the study of time is a worthy chore
is not Glamorgan's notion;
He's one to believe what's gone before
is dead if not in motion.
When it comes to tradition he takes the position
that trade, not predation, is grace;
And he has the proof, he's not just wishful:
He acts like a Cat and I keep his dish full:
an equation as enduring as space.
--copyright 1998 Lauren Bottomly
When the female read this to me I got up and started to dance. It just has that kind of meter. Then I fell down because I'm missing a back leg, and I can only hop so long on one foot. And I went to sleep.
Lauren and Vic shall be added to the sidebar. I advise you not to sue them. They're lawyers. I advise you not to sue me either. They're my friends. |
Zack, I cannot tell you how honored I am to be the friend of a dog who sleeps so adroitly. Sleep-challenged myself, I admire your abilities tremendously.
My chickens are most gratified by your proffer of protection, and they have made you an honorary member of the flock. They, of course, have only two legs apiece, but there are five of them, and they tend to move as a flock. They are like-minded and faithful to their purpose--in other words, rather perfect creatures and quite without guile. Snappish, though.
Legs can be over-rated. I have shin splints, and would not like to have them in three legs, much less four.